Okay, Basically It's A Blog At This Point - 2021

Monday, December 27, 2021 - 10:22 PM

Chaos, it's been a hot minute. I finally got around to making Page 49 of New Normal, so yay! ^_^;; Yeah, it's been a whiiiiile.

Shine angee - Sonic

Monday, November 15, 2021 - 2:38 PM

Speaking of adding things to the top bar! There's a section for my short stories, now! ^_^ It seemed like it was past time. Especially since I'm working to write more drabbles and explore all the ideas!

I hope you really like 'em!

Write all the things!!! - Sonic

Saturday, November 13, 2021 - 5:23 PM

HEY, GUESS WHAT!? We have a merch store now! So far it's only 2 shirts, but I'm hella excited! I hear really good things about Bonfire, and the reviews on it are really good. I'm really looking forward to seeing how the designs come out in person, and will absolutely be uploading photos when they arrive!

SWAG!!! - Sonic

Tuesday, November 9, 2021 - 7:54 PM

Oh hey, guess what! I drew a thing for TF Tuesday! Because I am hella a fan of TFs, and Tuesday had loooooong been my arbitrary update day for comics. ^_^ So yeah, TF Tuesday is kinda a rad weekly deal that I very much want to participate in.

V quick TF drawing of Violet and myself kissing while we transform into vir fursona and my actual self--or, a version of my actual self. ^_^;; Kinda a conglomeration of a few different ways I've drawn myself, while being particularly in pet headspace. But yeah. ^_^ I like smooching Vi.

10/10, would recommend smooching deer (at least this particular deer) - Sonic

Friday, November 3, 2021 - 5:49 PM

Chili Analogy

I have a really, really bad habit of going really hard, leaving everything on the table...and then having a collapsing breakdown in my limited free time because I didn't leave anything left to take care of myself with. Which, of course I do. I was raised with christian values, where you're supposed to hollow yourself out until there's nothing left and anything else is ungodly levels of selfishness, how dare you, and the only value is in sacrifice.

I still don't have much sensitivity to when I'm starting to be in a bad way--years of being forced to overexert myself and then just deal with the fallout as quiet and hidden to myself whenever I could kinda scarred that system up. So that's less than ideal. And like, being able to push stuff back to deal with something else is nice sometimes, either because I like helping, or because I desperately want a distraction from my own hurting. So how do you put limits on? How do you even go about making sure you aren't always in the red, because any time you have anything extra to spare you don't know what to do but use it to help someone else? Because there's ALWAYS someone to help.

So obviously this isn't something I can fix overnight. But maybe I should start thinking of my energy as chili. I like it, I like making it and think mine's pretty good, and I like to share it. But like, if I make some chili for myself and my family, I'm GOING to get that to my family. Like, I'll still happily share. But if the amount left gets low, and I perceive a danger that my family won't get to eat it, I'm gonna protect that, and I don't care, I'll stab a bitch. And like, I'm not gonna only feed them, either. Fuck you, of course I'm gonna eat with my family, that's not "extra", fuck off!

Cuz I'm not all alone anymore. When I let myself get hollowed out and need to break down and don't have enough left...they have to deal with that fallout now, too. And that's not fair to them. I can't protect my internal resources just for myself, I've got too much trauma about being considered selfish for expressing an opinion or preference (even when asked to do so). But for them, it might be different.

I was angrier about this, but then I ate food, and now I just want to figure out a way to make this actionable. Because I'm not sure where to go past changing my conception of The Problem.

Problem Sleuthing - Sonic

Saturday, October 30, 2021 - 8:32 PM

What? Who popped another drawing in the Gallery early (again)!

It was me. I did it! Okay, look, I can't actually schedule updates for this site, I can only go live immediately, and yeah, not planning on spawn-camping TF Tuesday to set stuff live. Shhhhh! This time I am putting it up the day after I posted it to Patreon, so at least it was Patreon-exclusive for a day this time. ^_^;; Usually I just opt to Not Announce Here that I've added something to the wherever.

This one is a bit odd, and personal, and yeah. I was gonna snark, "Like any of my art isn't personal!" but I've posted commissions! ^_^ And yeah. Those aren't particularly personal.

This particular one is the first of a series of illustration and short drabble pairings I've started doing, where I kinda give myself space to work through kinky ideas and feelings, ^_^;; and possibly some other ideas, going by my notes! But yeah. It feels weird and personal to share, but yeah! I like exploring it.

Spoooopy season! - Sonic

Wednesday, October 27, 2021 - 8:28 PM

Chaos, it's been a minute. I love having, and using this website, but it always feels like places like Twitter or Patreon are the "More Proper" choice to do things on. Though admittedly Twitter's not the Proper place to do anything, it's usually just a more convenient one. And yeah, I could put long-form stuff on Patreon, it would make sense, automatically update people that I'd posted, I keep this up mostly out of stubborn-ness and nostalgia, blah-blah-blah...but like...it's okay that that's what I like about this place.

Like, I'd love to have a slight website redesign so that this thing would have dynamic scaling and not cut off images on mobile as bad. And maybe I will sometime. Not any time soon, since that'd require me to either learn how to build a site from the ground up (I did try...and got suuuuper frustrated after hours of effort) or paying someone to do it for me, since I am definitely spoiled enough to seriously dislike the template options available...and I'm never installing Wordpress again if I can help it! Fucking hell, Wordpress. But oh well, this is still okay for now.

But yeah. I got nostalgia-bombed last night by a chance comment, and it led me into digging through the WayBack Machine archive of my old site from high school and college... and those are some powerful memories. I spent so, so many hours on the back end of that thing, and this experience with this site? It's the same. I'm still doing the same thing. And that's kinda comforting in a bizarre way. Heh! The fact that I've made sure to host the old comics I worked on back then on here probably helps reinforce that feeling of continuity.

Chaos, I'm also seeing some of the community I'd worked to bring into that site, and like, that was definitely me pushing back against how lonely making and curating the site's content could be, but also, I liked bringing my friends into the ride. I might look at pestering my mates and friends for ridiculous things to put up here, because that was also fun.

But yeah, SonicSpirit.net is totally DarkWindStudios.com mark 2, and that's kinda adorable. I think I'm just gonna keep playing on here, throwing stuff up, doing what feels right...because quite frankly, I like the continuity, and it's fun.

Nostalgia-bombs are like that <3 - Sonic

Thursday, May 6, 2021 - 12:54 PM

WHOOP! We got a new comic page!

Plans? I'm not so great at plans. - Sonic

Friday, April 16, 2021 - 9:14 PM

Weeelp! I've kinda fallen off the side of the planet for a hot minute...long story short, sold my house and moved across the country in a month and a half. Hopefully things start settling down, now!

Buuut I'd also apparently not posted some New Normal pages here, so rectifying that!

Did Shine say he's pissed yet? Cuz he's a mite pissed - Sonic

Tuesday, January 12, 2021 - 6:39 PM

Page 41 of New Normal is live!

Did Shine say he's pissed yet? Cuz he's a mite pissed - Sonic