Trying to Breathe Through a Panic Attack

October 29, 2022

I can't breathe through a panic attack. I can breathe to avert one, but once it's a full-blown thing, I can't use controlled breathing to get through. When I'm in a panic attack, it's too late.

Because I'm already working to control my breathing. I'm almost always aware of my breathing, and usually consciously controlling it. Not 100% of the time, but most times, yes. I'm doing it now.

Soooo the times I've had a panic attack, I was already fighting to breathe intentionally, and when someone (a therapist, my mates) tried to get me to breathe--because I was holding my breath--would try to get me to breathe...haven't gone well. Because I'm already putting pressure on myself to control my breathing, and having someone try to help me do just that ends up putting even more pressure on--so I just get even more freaked about failing to control my breathing. Keeping trying at the same level I had been looks like I'm not trying to control my breathing. And trying harder--goes bad. I start gasping, feeling like I'm going to throw up, wracking coughing--the previously controlled breathe and hold--not sufficient or regular, but what I can manage in the moment, breaks down into further distress.

What does help, though? For me? Stopping trying. I'm already so bound up inside myself, so sure I'm failing, or made a huge mistake, just lost in the moment. But release? That actually helps.

I've forgotten to bring it up when I'm calm and able to, because, yanno, things look different and memories flow different between panic attacks and not. I need to ask my partners to just gently point out to me if I stopped breathing when I'm in a panic attack, rather than trying to guide my breathing.

But yeah. Breathing exercises are usually a pretty good, safe staple for helping with anxiety disorders and panic attacks, but as always, it's not one size fits all.