2024/11/15

12:13p

Nicole "fired" me just now. Just a, "Things changed for me, I'm going in a different direction." Writing this while it's fresh.

It hasn't been working. Her teaching style hasn't been meshing with my learning style. I wanted to quit, and I'm sure it was clear I was frustrated. Still feel rejection.

Rationalizing. Probably because of the Professionalism talk. So probably because I openly talked about my grievances over overworking horses and the mill feed. To clients. I still feel that the lack of transparency is a problem, and that the way the Garrod's don't field criticisms well is bad.

Her teaching me made me feel like I could never do anything right. Admittedly, a trigger for me. By the time she was going over saddling, leading, etc, I'd been working under her for months. Too little, too late. And I have my own preferred approaches. I like to lead by touch, not sight. I was admittedly way more frustrated than I should've been at her corrections, especially when it was the way she wanted to train her personal horse. But again, really, reeeeally late for corrections.

I dunno. I'm relieved, but it stings.